Friday, July 11, 2008

BATDANCE


Ah, my life...
As you all know, the Quilter and I have been talking again. Many of you think that this is a bad idea, becuase of what happend in the past. I mean, he's told me several times that Bi-Sexual Boyfried and him are OVER, but are they? They've had dinner two times in a row and I have the feeling that (maybe) I am going to be left out in the rain again. Why do I continue to do this to myself?
This Novermber I will be turning 36 years old. I've already started losing my hair and what hair I have is starting to turn grey (by the way, go fuck yourself ADVOCATE!). My weight continues to fluctuate, I have the voice of an eleven year old boy, I've never considered myself to be good looking by any means, I have no muscle definition, and...well, you get the gist of it.
My relationship with Tim has evolved into something that I just don't feel works for me anymore. I still love him, but I don't think I can spend another 10 years trying to make it work. What's an (almost) 36 year old (almost) single man in Bakersfield to do?
Settle.
Settle for being in either a loveless relationship or being second best to a bisexual.

2 comments:

Wonder Man said...

Be neither, Christopher. Be free, you deserve better than a loveless romance and a hot mess past. You don't need to keep this stuff in your life, it's bringing you down. I know you didn't ask for advice, but I just feel that you are too good to except this sadness as your life. Close this book and start a new story. You deserve better.

Anonymous said...

Shaved head is always sexy. Own it! You know I have told you that you are a really good person but don't go seeking love because of loneliness. Let it find you in time and it will be right. Just remember like I always tell you... YOU are not alone! You will always have friends that care for you and will be there for you in your time of need. Whether we are down the street or 200 miles away. Do what you want...you deserve that!