Monday, November 9, 2009
C H A N G E
Revenge. On movies or on television shows we cheer when the star "gets revenge" on the person who in some way wronged them. I have been thinking about revenge a lot as of late. Much like Homer Simpson-- I have a mental list of all of the people I wish to see karma come and bite them on the ass.
I wanted all of these people to pay: the evil girls from my former job who made my life hell, The Quilter, Chris Bob, and a handful of others who I think that revenge is a dish best served cold. I wanted them to hurt like I have hurt and to cry as I have cried.
For some reason, I forgave all of those people listed above and prayed for them and myself. Time is so short and keeping all of that hate in my heart wasn't psychologically healthy or physically healthy. I won't get better mentally until I am able to let go of this desire for revenge or the desire to hurt people. I've got to work on one person: me. I have to let it go and let my heart be open to the two thing I'm afraid of the most-- feeling love and being loved. I have to truly begin to heal.