Thursday, May 15, 2008

LOVE BITES


Dear Chris P.,
I'm sorry for everything. Your boyfriend Paul is madly in love with me. He told me this while you were on vacation. He tells me he can't stop thinking about me and quite frankly, it makes me nervous. You're second best, I'm afraid. Thankfully, I am not in love with Paul--as I could never love a man who finds farting funny and who dresses like a teenage boy. I hope we can still be friends.
Yours,
CHRIS

3 comments:

Projekt R3volution said...

In your wildest dreams sister!
Now excuse me while I go back to being a homewrecker ;)

Alex said...

I feel like I am a bad episode of Melrose Place.. And I am still the gay guy that is not getting laid in the apartment complex!!!! Sigh...

Christopher said...

My dearest Chris, I truly do appreciate your honesty, and yes, you & I will remain friends, despite my man's infidelity. I will take care of his wandering eye asap. You really can't blame Paul though, I mean, have you looked at your skinny ass lately? You are one sexy muthaf*cker! Even I find it hard to keep my hands off of you whenever we're together.

Please know this: if we ever encounter a certain individual (with outdated hair & reeking of pity) out in public, you & I will make out in front of this person like 2 bunnies in heat...I'm talking shirts coming unbuttoned, hands down the pants, and maybe even some hair pulling...and you better tell "T" that I'm pulling him into the make out session too. Paul can take pics for our blogs...that should make things right.

Love, Amigo Bear